1. |
room #2
02:25
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you wrote a sound
and printed on skin
the words made flesh
let you sink in
your thoughts
your hopes
allison
we never were
the bad nights
they make me who i am
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2. |
braces
06:40
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i walked outside today and on the way i watched two cardinals stand on telephone wires.
intertwined, they left behind their home just to meet me alone in the road
and asked me:
"are you struggling to breathe?"
hang me by the wrist, devour a crucifix
we go to school and we suffer
we go to bed and we wither
its too late to wither just embrace
i can regrow, i will dig a hole to plant the seed again.
now i retreat back inside the house
the things i create will all die now.
we go to school and we suffer
we go to school and we are another.
we go to bed and we wither
we go to bed above the covers
we don't embrace. just like lovers we don't embrace.
oh i'm cold so sick
motionless
take me down from the high i felt
oh its not so hard
i can't breathe
take me down from the high i lost
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3. |
blossom
03:53
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i saw the ocean underneath my feet
my eyes fell heavy as i went to sleep
your breath was hot on my wounds
on my world
i got lost in your song
and went blind for you, blossom
i thought the world would be kind to me
(i guess not)
i'm not as together as i should be
with flowers in your hair, we run away
your breath was heavy on my wounds
on my shoulders
i got lost in your song
and went blind for you, blossom
i knew the world would be cruel to me
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4. |
first song 3
04:15
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everyone is dull
but we're so fucking mean
i wrote you a note
and covered it in blood
when i was back at school
stay up for weeks
now i'm twenty two
still can't sleep
you know where i go
when i'm home alone.
glass house black lights
in time i'll be all right no i won't be all right
when i was back with you
held your hand for weeks
then my heart came to
i do what my mind wants me to do
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5. |
origami girlfriend
05:43
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i promised i would stop medicating
when i grew too worn out
barely sleeping at all
but when i do its of folded pieces of paper
barely sleeping at all
but when i dream its of folded pieces of paper
i can't see the beginning anymore
the spring is in your fear
i can't see the beginning anymore
because i've grown too worn out.
barely sleeping at all
but when i do its of folded pieces of paper
barely sleeping at all
but when i dream its of folded pieces of paper
igniting
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6. |
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i awoke in some midwest home and i killed my best friend just to
breathe the air again but now he’s all i see.
i tied up and tortured my heart so i could let it see me for what i will always be but now i'm all they'll see.
i live alone but i'm never alone
left a trail leading to the front porch of that midwest home
and you pull back the curtains and reveal me at the window
are you scared of how i look?
do i look like someone you knew?
someone who couldn't give a fuck about how things are or how they were or how many times drinks you've had tonight
i am nothing but a knife.
i am nothing but a knife that works its way into your heart
i am nothing but a night alone and your mom won't answer the phone
i am nothing but a knife that twists its way into your bones
i am nothing but a night alone.
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7. |
axon of neptune
03:32
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a christian dying in my arms
what do i tell him when he shuts his eyes
we crawl out just to be pulled back in
pulled back pull back that camera
i ache up this street
where our blood meets
you took out your eyes
although, you still watch me
lift the veil
the blackest eyes
the devils eyes
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8. |
sleep forever again
03:22
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we are not lost souls. we are nothing but footsteps on the floor.
i'll cross my fingers and fall backwards
every movement causes reactions
i feel nothing still
i wish i could sleep till i die alone
i wish no one else was home
i'm high on regret
in fact i'm overrun by it
i'm breathless when i sleep
i'm lifeless in our dreams
we are not lost souls! we will forget our names. i drag my limbs through these rooms. we don't feel, we don't feel at all.
i wish no one else was home
let me sleep till i die alone
i'm high on regret
in fact i'm overrun by it
i'm killing my body for dreams
i'm killing my body for sleep
you're near the canvas
we can't really be there
such a shallow ending
no closure for us
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9. |
i'd quit smoking for you
07:01
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stretch out those walls
we're behind them all
and i whisper to you:
"hey, are you there?
are you there?"
fade, it'll never fade
a portrait burns cold
i don't have a hand to hold
but you say: "no
we are not alone.
are you alone?"
i swear to all that i believe in.
death, you'll save me from this storm.
i can't stop torturing myself.
because i don't know what else to do
i don't know if i can make it.
i swear to all that i believe in.
devil, will you drown me in this soul?
i can't stop torturing myself.
if i'm gone you'll never know.
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10. |
fuck
03:15
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do you think it matters to me
because i don't feel that much
i mean yeah i felt for you
but hey i'm used to sleeping alone
its fine its whatever
its cool we're whatever
fuck it its whatever
fuck it its whatever
did this mean nothing to you
because i kinda read your face
i mean yeah i felt for you
but hey i'm used to being alone
its fine its whatever
its cool we're whatever
fuck it its whatever
fuck it its whatever
you think you broke my heart
but i don't give a fuck
its fine its whatever
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11. |
alpha death
04:32
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they say we fly when we die but i don't believe it.
not even one bit.
they say in space no one can hear you sing but i don't believe it.
not even one bit.
you went to the moon for me and i don't believe it.
not even one bit.
you let yourself disconnect from the ship and you fell into space.
i don't believe it.
i saw your ghost
in the static of my tv
and you believe
you still believed
that you were alive
but we're our own fiction
you spread starless skies
where do you and i combine?
i'm always in the mold (the machinery takes hold)
every gear that doesn't turn (will lay me to waste)
last night i was alone (the machinery takes hold)
and you spoke to me (so shrill, so hushed)
Kimberly, do you hear me?
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12. |
skincrawl
03:29
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outside of my mothers house
with the rain on my feet
i know i'm empty
and at peace
inside of no ones body
with the flesh on my hair
i am hopeful
and hollow all at once
you slowly make your way to me
crawling in a stoned dream
and we never speak
we only sing
i miss you
i miss you
and i wanna come home
but he's taken my place.
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13. |
first song 4
04:30
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why do you have to go home?
and it was something beautiful
but now its under my lungs
my tongue kisses teeth
my tongue tastes bleach
and i was crawling in shit
and loving all of this
but i'm nobody without my flaws
i was nobody at all
why do you have to go home?
if i push the knife into my chest
will the blade retract or seep into my cells
i welcome death like smoke into my soul
the thought of you helps me sleep at night
the thought of death helps me rest my eyes
who are we
you are home
oh why do you have to go?
and you talk like how you do
when you're on the phone
so i covered my bones
in dirt and sugar
to keep ourselves at home
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14. |
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i get so cold.
even when it is warm.
i thought i hurt you.
but its you who hurt yourself.
and i know i'm fucking doomed.
there is nothing.
go find that person that you wanted me to be.
go trap that person and never set them free.
and i walk through the house
and i tear at my skin to remind me that i am alive.
but i don't feel alive.
but you do.
i know you do.
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